Friends

This was my all-time favorite show during Bible College Days. We would have a “Friends” Watching Party every Thursday night with all of my room- mates and our guy friends. There were 4 of us girls and 3 guys. We thought we were like the cast of “Friends”.  We would even watch reruns twice a day as well. Pretty pathetic I know but it provided many laughs and inside jokes amongst us. We were having so much fun together but then two of the guys in our possy got in a huge fight and it ruined everything. In fact, things never went back to being the same again. We were all sad and grieved our way over it.

That seems to happen a lot in life. We have a list of ex-friends aka “frenemies” that we part ways with over one thing or another.  Some friends we just have for a season until one of us moves away. Personally, I have grieved the loss of a few friends in my life.   I had a really hard time letting them go whether it was due to my decision or theirs. Looking back, I can really see God’s hand in all of it. I believe He decided to take some of those friends out of my life for a reason. Some of them were not beneficial to my personal growth or to the health of my marriage.

I have also learned to listen to my husband’s insights on girlfriends. He is a very good judge of character and sure enough, the ones he warned me about are the ones I am not friends with anymore.

The perception might be that I have a lot of friends because I know a lot of people specifically at church. But this would be a falsehood. I am very selective about who I let into my inner circle especially as a mom and wife. It’s funny how your friends change based on your children’s ages. I have different criteria now. They have to be like minded in the ways of the Lord, have good council, a healthy perspective on life in general, known for their character and that their word means something, not be a gossip, hypocrite or husband basher.

This does not mean they have to be exactly like me .In fact, true friendship means you are free to have different opinions, views and ways of doing things. We can learn a lot from each other and appreciate our differences. My best friend from back home and I always laugh at ourselves. We are so different! She wears things I would never be caught dead in and visa versa! She posted on facebook not long ago this fabric that she is obsessed with doing her living room in. I told her that I thought it was the ugliest thing I have ever seen! We had a good laugh about it.

With good friends, you can work through hard stuff even though there might be ebbs and flows to the relationship. A true friendship stands the test of time and is honest even though it might sting a little. They challenge us to grow in the areas that we are lacking and are patient in helping us with things that are their strengths. I am thankful for the ones I have in my life like that, they are such a blessing.

“He who walks with the wise will grow wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.” Proverbs 13:20

We need to be careful of the friends we choose because our reputation will be known by the people we associate with. It is true for kids and adults the same.

Unfortunately, I have been bitten in the butt for sharing too much personal information and I have paid a price. I can never get those words back. The older I get, the wiser I get. For instance, like this blog. I would love to share with candor all of my weaknesses, failures, shortcomings and flaws. All of my deepest heartaches, sorrows, trials and tribulations. But that would not be wise to put out there for anyone and everyone who does not know me to read.  That kind of stuff I will save for the select few that I can trust who have my best interest at heart.

I wish life could be like a TV show, full of funny jokes and all of our problems solved in a half hour but reality is not like that. 

In our lifetime, there will be a few precious things to collect along our journey and friends would be one of them.